Dear ‘other women’….
I know you think you won a battle, took the prize. I used to blame you. Then I realized a few things. Number one, if he can’t be faithful to his wife of 18 years, I can assure you he can’t be faithful to you, a simple side piece he is using to boost his fragile, aging ego.
I know the things he said about me, some are true, others are not. All said to make you feel bad for how he’s had it. How hard it was to have a wife waiting at home every night, how difficult it was that his wife supported him through getting his bachelors degree, a masters degree and finally a doctorate. I encouraged him, pushed him, wanted him to achieve all the dreams that first wife seemed to quell.
I know he has quoted to Beatles songs, I think “In My Life” is his personal favorite, quoting the line that all that matters is that he has been loved by you. Yeah, he did that for me too. He told me of the heartbreak of losing his son, and cried the only real tears I’ve ever seen him cry. And you felt bad, you wanted to comfort him. And you fell for that manipulation. He told you how he hadn’t been himself in years but you made him feel more like himself (yup, I heard that line, too). Did he say he wrote you song? Did he sing it for you? Yup, I got the same song.
You may think you are ‘special’…but you aren’t alone. There are at least two other women he is singing to same song to. Eliciting the same feelings of sorrow from.
Oh, and that money you think he is going to spend on you? Do you know what alimony is?
With what he makes as a ‘doctor’ (and I use that term loosely, as he behaves contrary to every tenant of being a healthcare provider), you might think you caught a big fish. Know how he got that degree. Loans. Loans that are now coming due. With payments more then the mortgage.
So think what you will, live in your dream world. I know all about you, more then you could possibly ever imagine. I read every email, I know who you are, what you are, and what you think you are.
I’m not angry anymore. I’m grateful. Grateful for finding those emails, grateful I got to walk away and no longer play the fool. And you can ask him, I hold everything in my hands. I can bring ruination to his life on under a minute. Because of YOU. But as long as he serves a purpose (paying my rent, my car payment, my insurance….) I will let you all be. I have the knowledge, I can and will use it. Don’t forget that.
OH, and if I EVER find out that you have talked about my kids or even considered meeting them or friending them on facebook or something…..well, know your place. Know your roll. Harpy, addict, whore.
Good luck and thank you for taking that giant mess off my hands.
The One True Queen